


Please Don't Say You Love Me

by peacekindnesspossibility



Category: Sex Education (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Masturbation, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-16 00:18:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18680233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peacekindnesspossibility/pseuds/peacekindnesspossibility
Summary: From anonymous on tumblr: What happened in between when Jakob left Jean in the kitchen to get dressed and when we see she slept with cereal Dan again later that night?Aka Jean has fantasies and uses Dan to try and get control back.





	Please Don't Say You Love Me

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to the person on Tumblr who submitted this prompt to me! I hope you enjoy!

The sex was good. Really good. The best she’s had in ages, actually. Perhaps that’s what spooked her. Perhaps that’s why as soon as he shows a flicker of sincerity, she cuts and runs. Because there’s no way a man could be that good in bed, that thorough at satisfying her (she’s a sex therapist for heaven’s sake! How the hell did he teach her a new position?), and genuinely feel connected to her…right? That’s not what sex is about. Not for her, not anymore.

She tries to wash the remnants of him off, the water of her shower almost scalding. But when she’s done, she’s even more riled up than ever. She can’t get his face out of her mind, his earnest blue eyes as he’d taken her hand. She’s used to rejecting men. She does it quite frequently. In fact, she likes to think she’s got it down to an art at this point. But something about Jakob Nyman…she feels like she’s the one who has been rejected.

She misses him.

The realization hits her like a freight train. It’s been less than an hour and she already wishes she could call him back. But she can’t. She blew it. She knows this.

It’s for the best, she tells herself. There’s no point in getting attached. Not to any man, not ever again.

She presses her lips together. Her mind can lie all it wants, but her body still betrays her. She’s wet. Even thinking about him, she’s soaked between her thighs. 

She growls under her breath, throwing her robe to the ground and laying naked on her bed. She’s not a stranger to self-pleasure. She participates in it quite frequently. It’s natural. But this time, there’s an aggression to it. If she had her therapist hat on, she’d wonder if she’s perhaps punishing herself for driving him away. But she doesn’t. Instead, she’s irrationally hoping one more good orgasm will get him out of her system, that perhaps that way she’ll stop seeing the blue flame of his eyes as he thrust into her. 

She moans at the memory, thighs falling open as her fingers start to rub at her clit. She’s just going to picture him this once, she tells herself, let this be the singular time she lets her mind flood with memories of his big hands tenderly caressing her breasts, of deft workman’s fingers spreading her wetness through her folds, of his cock hard and warm and throbbing as he comes inside her…

She growls in her throat, tears of frustration rolling down her cheeks. She’s aroused, aroused beyond belief, but her orgasm stays firmly out of reach. For one stupid moment, she thinks about calling him again. But when she reaches for her phone, it’s not his number she dials. No, Jakob Nyman may be who she wants, but he’s not who she’s convinced herself she needs right now.

Jakob is a rocket ship out of control. He’s a wild ride that lights her up from the inside, that makes her feel more alive than ever, but that’s just the problem, isn’t it? She’d promised herself after Remi that she’d never let go like that again. He’d hurt her too much, left her too damaged. No, she’s happy with her cycle of one night stands and meaningless flings. It’s better this way.

Right?

“Hello, Dan? It’s Jean…do you remember me?”

She’s not gentle with Dan that night, riding him hard, restraining him, doing all sorts of things he lets her do because he likes surrendering. He lets her have control, and she desperately needs it. But every time she comes that night, it’s not Dan’s eyes she’s seeing, though they’re a lovely shade of hazel that otherwise she’d appreciate. No, when the sparks fly behind her eyes tonight, they’re blue. Bright blue.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Feel free to leave kudos, comments, or message me more prompts on Tumblr!


End file.
